The Most Deserving

I'm currently on my work trip and will be gone for the next two days, so my anxiety is at an all-time high. Nico doesn't do well typically when I'm gone, so I have to do a lot of prepping in the days leading up to my trips. This includes filling out the "mommy away, … Continue reading The Most Deserving →

The Release and Relief of Grief

Nico’s birthday was this week. It was the first birthday where he actually told me what he wanted to do for it. I have asked him how he wished to celebrate his birthday in years past, but he never quite made the connection to what I was asking. This year he finally did. He told … Continue reading The Release and Relief of Grief →

One Magic Thanksgiving

I spent Thanksgiving in Sedona, Arizona. It was one of the places from my childhood where I saw my parents the happiest. It felt like a magical place to me because of how happy they were. My parents were so in love with Sedona that my mom even said she would absolutely be retiring there … Continue reading One Magic Thanksgiving →

Go Easy on Yourself

I have always considered myself an optimistic person. I’m never overly optimistic though because I’m truly a realist. I understand that our expectations will not always match our reality, so I walk through life knowing that there will always be joy and sorrow, but they will never be equally doled out. In the last month … Continue reading Go Easy on Yourself →

Intuition

My Nico is so intuitive. He has always been able to empathize with others’ feelings. He isn’t always able to communicate his own feelings in the appropriate manner—apologizing for hurting himself when he should be focused on his pain, crying when he should be celebrating a milestone, or laughing when something sad has occurred—but he … Continue reading Intuition →

Another Adventure Awaits

I’ve been thinking a lot about caregiving recently. It’s something that I feel like I have been doing in one way or another for as long as I can remember, and it’s given me a great sense of purpose my whole life. In the simplest sense, I started early with caregiving. Growing up, I took … Continue reading Another Adventure Awaits →

With Open Arms

I love taking Nico to the trampoline park. He finds so much joy in jumping. He always has. He got his first trampoline when he was 2 years old, shortly after his diagnosis, and he used that tramp every single day until he outgrew it. I learned early on in his autism diagnosis that he … Continue reading With Open Arms →

Sponges

Today is the anniversary of my Mom’s passing. June 27. It pops up every year and for a few brief moments I am catapulted back to that tragic day where I lost my Mom and felt her indelible imprint all at once. My mother was perfectly imperfect. She had a heart of gold, a fierce … Continue reading Sponges →

Landslide

I’m sitting on a plane heading to Indianapolis for a family graduation and my boys are sound asleep. Could it be because we woke up at 530am, or possibly because I slipped a little dose of melatonin in their juice…can’t be sure (tongue and cheek moment), but I am calm for the first time since … Continue reading Landslide →

Motherhood is Forever and Always

Mother. Mom. Mommy. Mama. I’ve been called them all in these last 10 years and each time I hear my sons utter “my name” I mentally pinch myself because I still can’t believe I’m actually their mother. I didn’t grow up thinking about being a mom. I didn’t think about how many kids I would … Continue reading Motherhood is Forever and Always →